The Waiting Game


Drumming my fingers along my keyboard, I try to think of that feeling that won't let me sit still. Anxiety? Nervousness? Impatience? Any day now, I will be receiving back my first content edit. How many plot holes will she have found? Are my relationships between my characters meaningful? Will she tell me to burn it? ......ok, ok, I am being dramatic, she would never do that. I can say however, that I am really excited to work on whatever she gives back to me. Instead of looking at her constructive criticism as mistakes, I look at them as opportunities to make me a stronger author. Sure I am aware it's going to have plenty of flaws. Is anything perfect? 

So I am waiting. In that wait, I have outlined my next book and the beginning of my third. I have also spent more time with my family and friends and it's been an out of body experience to not be living in my fantasy world day in and day out. Like wondering, "hmmm, I wonder what Livia and Reddick are up too today?"  Even my cat has noticed that I haven't been writing anymore. The moment my laptop opens, she meows and runs over to lay across my left arm and stretch her paw out, thinking she is about to help me type the next greatest hit. Sigh. Poor Shota and her neediness to thrive off my attention.

The biggest thing that I have got to do since I sent my novel off, is that I have finally got to read other things. I finally got to start the fourth book of Sarah J. Maas's Court of Thorn and Roses Series! Court of Frost and Starlight. I still haven't finished, which is odd for me. (I am used to reading a book in a few days.) But I am finding it hard to concentrate on the story, like I am cheating on my own characters. I hear Vera saying, "why can't I fly and do cool things like that?" and I'm like, Vera, you can crush bones and stop hearts with a single flying really that much cooler? My characters are so needy. I have to constantly remind them that I made them and I can easily remove them......(geez I sound like my you mom!)

This whole process has been interesting and a huge learning experience. I can't wait to look back and call myself a newb, because that is exactly what I am in this moment and I am proudly embracing it!

So I wait.